And the terror reigns struck again ...

Should be i ashamed to say that terror attacks are happening at intervals as regular as some major sporting events - 2006, 2008, 2011 ??? Do i expect one in 2013 again or should we give them the benefit of doubt and say they can plan a lot quicker this time and have another event in 2012 ???

Why.. why do we have to be the only ones who suffer ? Why does the common man who is going about his daily work and returning to his awaiting family have to endure this tragedy and some wouldn't even return back home to see their loved ones ? what have does innocent shop keepers done to have their livelihood, their shops, their life long earnings blown up like this ?

I sincerely believe we have become a soft target for terror. They know they can get away with anything since we don't take a stand and strong action. When the perpetrator from the 2008 attacks are still enjoying a comfortable life in jail, why should we assume that those involved in smaller intensity attacks would be caught and punished ? We have tried with dialogues and talks; now maybe it's time we "DO" something.

Anyway despite all i have said, i know very little is going to be done. Have i turned pessimistic ??? No it's just the realist in me talking...

The secret diary

Man is said to be a social animal. Whosoever he/ she maybe, the need for belongingness is essential for him to fulfill. So we all have our parents, siblings, friends, colleagues and various other social relations we build - gym friends, blog buddies.. We need those relations to help us sustain through our lives as well. They give us that joy and comfort we desire, protect us when required, reprimand us as necessary. So what happens when these relations don't come through for the person when in need ??

I read one such story of a woman in yesterday's edition of the Bangalore Mirror. The cover story spoke of a a bubbly, vivacious girl who dreamed of the perfect marriage. Her diary like a faithful friend lapped up every word, every minute detail, every emotion she felt as she began to imagine her perfect life with the perfect guy. At the risk of sounding pessimistic and shattering this thought of "perfection" that most carry; I can say for sure no perfect life exists and more surely no perfect guy ( or gal) exists. However it felt nice to read of someone who believed so deeply that things were going to be good. You can tell she was brought with stories of princes and princesses and how they always lived happily ever after. So why taunt her for thinking her life was to tread down the same path ?? You can feel her excitement at seeing pics of her new home in Bangalore, the joy of seeing her fiancee after so many days apart, her sadness when her fiancee suggests they should not talk for a while. She is upset to learn of the many girlfriends the guy has had in the past but she believes now he is only hers.

Things start to look wrong even before the wedding takes place when the prospective in laws are upset with the bride's parents for not providing enough of gifts. They voice their opinion that they need to give more. Should the bride and her parents have put their foot down at this stage.. yes, so she feels but as she also writes she feels they are more obliged to finish off a responsibility they have (marrying off the daughter) than worry about these small matters. Things take a turn for the worse when after marriage she enters her new house only to discover her husband has a girlfriend and married her only because his parents insisted. Suddenly some incidents of the past make sense - he didn't want to talk to her after the engagement till he reached her home town, he seemed distant over the phone. Misbehaving in-laws who believe she isn't keeping their son happy, hapless parents who seem to be affected on learning this new development but are unwilling to do anything. You see her tears in every entry of that diary that says she is trying every trick in the book to save that marriage. She begs to God to help her; but somehow it fell on deaf ears too. Her last entry says her final goodbyes to her parents and brother; telling them that this is her decision and they shouldn't blame anyone.

Scares me how even after knowing of the situation the girl's parents did nearly nothing.. Frightening how just to please their parents some men go through a marriage as a formality and end up ruining a girl's life and most shocking is how, when all this evidence (and so many other stories like these) are printed and posted all over the internet, our laws and law makers have not become stringent enough.

For anyone who hasn't read the article - http://epaper.timesofindia.com/Default/Client.asp?Daily=BGMIR&showST=true&login=default&pub=MM&Enter=true&Skin=MIRRORNEW

Of course i love you Bangalore

Most of those who know me know how loyal i am to Mumbai; i ain't categorized as a mallu or south indian despite my last name - i am a true blue Mumbaikar...So what happens to this true blue Mumbaikar when she moves down south to a territory where Rajanikanth is idolized and worshipped, hindi is spoken like a foreign language, the street food - vada pav, open cheese mysore dosa n cuttin' chai do not exist, restaurants..clubs.. and everything else shuts at 11 30so as to deny me my night time cravings of burji pav, cheese pav bhaji, dabeli and masala chai .... she complains !!!

am she wrong to do so ??? No; not at the start at least but has she grown to love the city.... who's questioning that ?? My initial few days was filled with complaints - people don't speak hindi here, transport system sucks, everything shuts early, nothing to do here, things move so slowly around here .. blah blah n more of that ..

Now let's be honest most of these issues still continue to haunt me but why has the love for this city grown ?? B'lore has its own charm, it's a newer melange of people from various parts of the country - most of whom are brought by the almighty IT industry, the weather is soothing - not too harsh; winters feel like winters when everyone's wrapped in blankets, shawls and sweaters.. the sudden spring showers to cool you off; it taught me some new skills - haggling with the rickshaw guys; trying to decipher the Kannada language and getting the locals to understand my half hindi-english + hand gestures.

It taught me to live in a big city by myself but most of all, it brought this very awesome plethora of friends in to my life.. friends who have also left home and are living alone; who are also lovin' their independence and want to live it up every moment.. B'lore gives its people that chance to stop for a second and look how things are going on; things don't rush by in a mad rush. It's 3 years since i moved into this city - i cried my eyes out when i first saw my parents leave; n now the thought of ever having to move back; those tears are gonna come rushing back again !!!

Lorsque la mort est plus douce que la vie...

The past few days have seen tens of thousands of reports of the case of 60 yr old Aruna Shanbaug; a nurse in KEM hospital who was brutally assaulted, sodomized and left to die by a ward boy of the hospital. 37 years down, she is alive so to speak. The attack left her unable to move, talk or speak. Kudos to those nurse of KEM who have looked after her for nearly 4 decades. The recent petition filed in the SC by Pinki Virani dug out the old and never dying topic of euthanasia.

I know my views on euthanasia as a subject but in the case of Aruna that is so complicated, where she feels pain, smiles (at times) when called out to.. is that really a solution. I guess euthanasia does require a strong will and mind to see the person you cared for, die because you decided to pull the plug. Are we strong enough ??? i believe that is why the nurses in KEM hospital refuse to give up on her and celebrate the SC verdict on life for Aruna. So many different ways of looking at this.. what would i do if i had to see my loved one go through a similar situation, if he/she had no reaction, emotion, feeling; if his/her life was being prolong on machines and feeding tubes ?? is it fair to prolong their life bcoz i can't see them go ?? is it right to see them suffer ??

My grandma always said death should come peacefully, like it did for my granddad. I may sound cold as i take forward her thoughts and say life should be quality life as we live, else what difference would it make if we are here or not. Why be in a coma state with no reactions and feeling and still continue to "live". It saddens your family around you to see you that way, and i am sure in your heart you would never want to live that way.. They say life is a gift, live it well... so i ask if a life similar to what Aruna ( and many others across the globe ) is living is a gift, do we want it ??

India has taken a big stand by putting forward the idea of passive euthanasia; but i still wonder - are we emotionally ready to pull the plug ??

step up 2011.. it's time to kick ass !!!

It's 2011, how quickly time flies by !!!

Heard something very interesting ( could be awkward, weird and even stupid for some ); i asked my trainer at the gym today - so how was your new year ?? and he said " same old, same old... it is another year gone by, one more year in our life gone by... we have lost out on so much time"... Hhmmm is that for real ? Do people look at a new year and say God, how much time have i lost - i always believed it was a time to look and see all the wonderful things that have happened in the year gone by, leave all the sadness & tragedies of that year behind and look forward to super things in the new year.

There was a time i too had the same outlook to the new year - crib about the year gone by, complain that i don't know where i am heading and grumble that it's just another year. But 2010 has been eventful, very very eventful.

The finishing of the MBA.. many would agree thats an achievement... the call of the corporate world and the excitement of moving to your own lil house in a city outside of your home city.

Yes, i tasted the thrills of living alone away from home, from your family and usual circle of friends. From learning to manage money to learning your way around the city - it's all a headache but awesome none the less... how we crave for the 31st of every month to see the moolah in our a/c and how our hearts break when we pay rent, groceries, transport and that one damn nice meal outside... Those sodexho meal vouchers have become such an integral part of my life. Weekends is where you see the crux of the action - it is unbelievably thrilling... no my friends it's not the parties or the outings.. It is the regular jobs that need to be done around the house. The cleaning, washing, sorting, tiding up - aarrrghh !!! God forbid if u have had a nice lil party friday night :D The joy of seeing a post party house; ask me !!! But i would do it over and over again - the fun you have with all your friends at home is something you cant do in a club.. I live by my rules and noone questions me:D imagine the power trip.

It is a life i have started to love and enjoy; Thank you 2010 for all of this... 2011 ... you have to match up; you have to beat 2010 - You have to be kick ass !!!!